making it work

everything has been quite expensive these days. felice, zaza and i are trying to make some money out of baking and selling some cookies and oatmeal bars. we've been putting a lot of money and effort and a whole lot of time trying to make this work so we could have money enough for some shopping or just dream of going somewhere. (its only a dream...)

looking for materials that are cheaper and it took us places where we really have to feel the heat of the sun. it wasn't pleasant. if only you would to go out of the house and find sand and a beach to go to. or just a small swimming pool to dip in in the afternoon.

we are not rich, we have to work. i just hope it wouldn't take to much of my energy and it would mean less time and more fun. of course those jobs or career paths are taken only by the richer ones and as everyone knows i'm not one of them. (don't counter)

i have dreams, i have problems, i have so many things in my head, i want to stop thinking and just do things i want. if only i have the money. i hope my plan works. it doesn't have to perfect but atleast successful enough to make me go through life healthy and independent.

i really want to study more. to make me more knowledgeable of things i should do in order to run my company well. the problem is i have to have experience. i specialize in Entrepreneurship. i dont know how to work for a company. at first i was trying to apply for companies but in the end, i told myself that working in the corporate world is not for me. i have turned down a lot of companies and i can't even count them with my fingers. i have chosen a path i think is the wrong turn to "my success".

i've been thinking about the future a lot lately. i feel now that i'm getting older and older. i don't need the number in my age to tell me this but the responsibilities that keep coming and they keep piling up in all those stacks. i can't stop them and if i don't answer to them now, when will i ever will. i think this is the time. i have to decide. i know there is more time in my life but the list jsut keeps on getting longer and longer and my time shorter and shorter for all those things to happen.

work / career / future

love / life / family / friends

how can you balance all these things when you only have two hands, two feet, one mind, one heart?