actually it's kinda windy today. it's another ROTC training day but i didn't produce a single sweat today. the whole time there were no officers and we stayed the whole day in room M410. we had two lectures for the day... where i just fool around with the instructors. even if i was sleepy... i did get a lot of notes in the class...
but something happened...
my pen ran out of ink... so i had to stop taking down notes... and i became very sleepy and sleepy until i took a nap and woke up when we are having our recess...
recess: i had egg & cheese sandwich and a slice of marble cake. i wasn't full yet i don't want to buy another food. the food in that place is expensive. i was excited for the dismissal because i am going to buy siomai rice in agno... oh the siomai is good.
all good!
pero before i leave because im tired already, i'm gonna tell a little story. the one i was telling you about a girl on the bench..
well for starters, the girls name is kach. she is a girl found always at that specific bench with her friends and whoever just passes by. she's almost famous. but she has this specific friend that she wants to see that's why she goes to this bench, eeno.so all day when she has time or she even gets this crazy idea of just staying at that bench, she would. just to see eeno.
Saturday, February 07, 2004
Wednesday, February 04, 2004
isn't obvious...
i can't write anything tonight because i'm so busy doing my homeworks. tomorrow i'll tell you a story of a girl in a bench.. quite nice to read about.
so i'll let you think about the girl in a bench. i'll let you in a little...
the girl gets to... hehehe... just wait!
so i'll let you think about the girl in a bench. i'll let you in a little...
the girl gets to... hehehe... just wait!
Tuesday, February 03, 2004
soooo last week...
it has been a very rough university week for me. i have confronted with many things i didn't know how to handle by myself. and so what i did was just hangout and drink to it. i know in a matter of time, all my troubles would go away.
Monday (January 26, 2004) - nothing happened. sheng.
Tuesday (January 27, 2004) - nothing actually happened. sheng.
Wednesday (January 28, 2004) - Parokya Concert in Ampi during U-break. OH i would never forget the opening band. they were so good and the drummer was so cute(pag malayo!)... i wish he is cute up close and personal. they weren't the typical band who would be playing the rock or alternative or what some people look as the "noise".. the moment they started the soundcheck they got me mouth hanging from my face. oh they were very very good! i couldn't believe they were playing those 70's type of music.
and imagine. they were the engineering people so, they are very very intelligent plus they are musically inclined. the drummer was singing - twist and shout... la bamba... etc... i would give anything to get to meet the whole band. 100 PGI POINTS for yoU! they weren't the typical opening act where the audience were bored... they got the audience and they got good!
but when Parokya arrived. AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I wanted to run to the stage and take the microphone and sing witht he band. i just wish i did. they can't stop me... you know i'm big. and you know it.!
"tama na yan. inuman na! o pare ko tumagay ka!"
Thursday (January 29, 2004) - nothing really happened. hindi sheng.
i was waiting for james meneseses in agno for 2 hours but unfortunately he forgot he had to go home early. i understand naman. pero sana man lang nagtext ka... kaso ok lng din because my phone was off (low batt! buiset!) so it was okay. i was hanging out in my kingdom the whole night upto 6:30 with dream. oh he is so cute.. even if i didn't drink that night, i was drunk with all the hugs i received from him. we were fooling around and i got to hug him and he hugs me back..(dreams do come true!) WOOHOO!
Friday (January 30, 2004) - Battle of the Bands. i ahd to cut class becaus ei had to attend a cultural concert but i didn't attend. i just told the president to sing me up. so he did. thanks HERSHEY! so i hanged out the whole time in GP. this is not Glorietta Pour(long story! tell you some other time)... Green Place... had one bottle of beer.
just one!
i miss those nights when there were practices at my place for the bandfest. i miss the stage. the crowd and the music. i only hear them in my player. the shouts and cheers. i really cant resist. i can't stop cheering. when the band started to shout at the top of my lungs - I love you _____________(the band members) even if i don't know them. and i would shout it out loud when the band is setting up their equipments. it was so much fun. but i was so sad when the band i was cheering for didn't win. i actually cheered for everybody but the guys i knew didn't.
it was so much fun. it has been a very long time since i have shouted like that... except when i see cockroaches... they're just yucky!!!
Saturday (January 31,2004) - ROTC time. it was tiring actually we were soaked under the sun for two hours and we wwere taught by the officers to from our company and march around the field. but the most tiring part was the drop. we had to drop in the very muddy field without doing anything.
it was just tiring. when i got home. i sleep. when i woke up. i slept.
Sunday (February 1, 2004) - tiring. i just slept the whole day.
one thing. i wasnted to share that a friend of mine told me someone is admiring me because i can hangout with the boys... she meant that i was one-of-theboys type of person. that i could hangout with boys alone. and even if im the only girl i could still enjoy myself. i don't know why but im just more comfortable with them. not that being with the girls isn't omfortable but i mean im just used to with the boys. i can realte to them and play with them and fool around with them if i have to. i just can interact witht hem without worries...
no insecurities. not like other girls out there who has to impress pa guys to get to be close to them. what a waste of time noh!...
well just want to share that. but i was thinking of something my cousin, lola and i had talked about last week.
its about the abortion and the adoption. i told them that i was okay with it abortion. i mean just kill the child if you're going to give them away when they are out here already. i not saying im going to kill my baby if i had one. i'm just saying if you decide to give birth to the baby, be sure you will not give them away. i mean the hild has the right to be with their real parents. it will not be really easy for the child to grow up without the presence of their birth parents.
i just can't help but think of the stories whatsoever i have heard and so in the movies.
it was dreadful for the hild who has grown up knowing that she is with her parents bnut knowing that he not. that they are not the real ones. it was just sad that they had to be confronted with such pain because of one simple mistake of giving away your baby.
i just don't like the idea of giving away babies. i gave birth and he/she is mine. he/she is my blood and skin and i can't understand how some parents could handle letting other people take care of their babies.
because in reality, people can't afford to take care of the baby. okay. reason accepted. i just wished you planned before doing a deed that brought about the baby in the first place.
i can't really say. i mean. if the time comes that i would have a baby. i wouldn't really know what i would do. but if you think about it. i would never really give my baby away. i would maybe kill it if its only like a dot inside me.
all im saying is...
"practice safe sex"
but if you can't do that.
don't do sex at all!!!!
Monday (January 26, 2004) - nothing happened. sheng.
Tuesday (January 27, 2004) - nothing actually happened. sheng.
Wednesday (January 28, 2004) - Parokya Concert in Ampi during U-break. OH i would never forget the opening band. they were so good and the drummer was so cute(pag malayo!)... i wish he is cute up close and personal. they weren't the typical band who would be playing the rock or alternative or what some people look as the "noise".. the moment they started the soundcheck they got me mouth hanging from my face. oh they were very very good! i couldn't believe they were playing those 70's type of music.
and imagine. they were the engineering people so, they are very very intelligent plus they are musically inclined. the drummer was singing - twist and shout... la bamba... etc... i would give anything to get to meet the whole band. 100 PGI POINTS for yoU! they weren't the typical opening act where the audience were bored... they got the audience and they got good!
but when Parokya arrived. AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I wanted to run to the stage and take the microphone and sing witht he band. i just wish i did. they can't stop me... you know i'm big. and you know it.!
"tama na yan. inuman na! o pare ko tumagay ka!"
Thursday (January 29, 2004) - nothing really happened. hindi sheng.
i was waiting for james meneseses in agno for 2 hours but unfortunately he forgot he had to go home early. i understand naman. pero sana man lang nagtext ka... kaso ok lng din because my phone was off (low batt! buiset!) so it was okay. i was hanging out in my kingdom the whole night upto 6:30 with dream. oh he is so cute.. even if i didn't drink that night, i was drunk with all the hugs i received from him. we were fooling around and i got to hug him and he hugs me back..(dreams do come true!) WOOHOO!
Friday (January 30, 2004) - Battle of the Bands. i ahd to cut class becaus ei had to attend a cultural concert but i didn't attend. i just told the president to sing me up. so he did. thanks HERSHEY! so i hanged out the whole time in GP. this is not Glorietta Pour(long story! tell you some other time)... Green Place... had one bottle of beer.
just one!
i miss those nights when there were practices at my place for the bandfest. i miss the stage. the crowd and the music. i only hear them in my player. the shouts and cheers. i really cant resist. i can't stop cheering. when the band started to shout at the top of my lungs - I love you _____________(the band members) even if i don't know them. and i would shout it out loud when the band is setting up their equipments. it was so much fun. but i was so sad when the band i was cheering for didn't win. i actually cheered for everybody but the guys i knew didn't.
it was so much fun. it has been a very long time since i have shouted like that... except when i see cockroaches... they're just yucky!!!
Saturday (January 31,2004) - ROTC time. it was tiring actually we were soaked under the sun for two hours and we wwere taught by the officers to from our company and march around the field. but the most tiring part was the drop. we had to drop in the very muddy field without doing anything.
it was just tiring. when i got home. i sleep. when i woke up. i slept.
Sunday (February 1, 2004) - tiring. i just slept the whole day.
one thing. i wasnted to share that a friend of mine told me someone is admiring me because i can hangout with the boys... she meant that i was one-of-theboys type of person. that i could hangout with boys alone. and even if im the only girl i could still enjoy myself. i don't know why but im just more comfortable with them. not that being with the girls isn't omfortable but i mean im just used to with the boys. i can realte to them and play with them and fool around with them if i have to. i just can interact witht hem without worries...
no insecurities. not like other girls out there who has to impress pa guys to get to be close to them. what a waste of time noh!...
well just want to share that. but i was thinking of something my cousin, lola and i had talked about last week.
its about the abortion and the adoption. i told them that i was okay with it abortion. i mean just kill the child if you're going to give them away when they are out here already. i not saying im going to kill my baby if i had one. i'm just saying if you decide to give birth to the baby, be sure you will not give them away. i mean the hild has the right to be with their real parents. it will not be really easy for the child to grow up without the presence of their birth parents.
i just can't help but think of the stories whatsoever i have heard and so in the movies.
it was dreadful for the hild who has grown up knowing that she is with her parents bnut knowing that he not. that they are not the real ones. it was just sad that they had to be confronted with such pain because of one simple mistake of giving away your baby.
i just don't like the idea of giving away babies. i gave birth and he/she is mine. he/she is my blood and skin and i can't understand how some parents could handle letting other people take care of their babies.
because in reality, people can't afford to take care of the baby. okay. reason accepted. i just wished you planned before doing a deed that brought about the baby in the first place.
i can't really say. i mean. if the time comes that i would have a baby. i wouldn't really know what i would do. but if you think about it. i would never really give my baby away. i would maybe kill it if its only like a dot inside me.
all im saying is...
"practice safe sex"
but if you can't do that.
don't do sex at all!!!!
Friday, January 23, 2004
nothing really...
the day hasn't been exciting. i went to school and studied. eat hangout and chill! the main purpose of my existence in school.
good day!
good day!
Thursday, January 22, 2004
kung hei fat choi!
Happy new year to the chinese society out there. i'm actually part chinese but we don't celebrate chinese new year. pero what i love about chinese new year is the rice cake. here it is called tikoy. heaven.. pero baka tumaba pa ko lalo! im trying to work out... i mean not go to the gym pero work out something to make my body fit enough!!! ahahah... impossible... but i know i can do it...
so many people are inviting me to parties they are having and i one wasn't gonna stop so, chloe, a very close friend, picked me up and put me the drinking chamber!! drinking again! and again! everybody was drinking but they were trying to get me drunk! but they failed! so i went home and now im using the computer. im just filling out this page... i just want to tell you guys what other small things had happen to me today. right after my 4:10pm class, i waited for james (boyfriend of San) in my kingdom. hahaha and i know i was bound to sing a lot. and i did! so when he got there. we got to talk about stuff.. and stuff.. hahaha and we left by 7:00pm. i did sing a lot. people come and go. and i was there... and people came back and i was still there. what a life. HARI NG TAMBAY!
new yeaR! what will my resolution be? i don't know. i can't be certain. hindi ako pwede magsalita ng tapos
so many people are inviting me to parties they are having and i one wasn't gonna stop so, chloe, a very close friend, picked me up and put me the drinking chamber!! drinking again! and again! everybody was drinking but they were trying to get me drunk! but they failed! so i went home and now im using the computer. im just filling out this page... i just want to tell you guys what other small things had happen to me today. right after my 4:10pm class, i waited for james (boyfriend of San) in my kingdom. hahaha and i know i was bound to sing a lot. and i did! so when he got there. we got to talk about stuff.. and stuff.. hahaha and we left by 7:00pm. i did sing a lot. people come and go. and i was there... and people came back and i was still there. what a life. HARI NG TAMBAY!
new yeaR! what will my resolution be? i don't know. i can't be certain. hindi ako pwede magsalita ng tapos
crazy
it was the craziest day. i went to school early because i had to take an iteo test (reading comprehension), which i didn't finish by the way because i stopped when i was in my 2nd to the last question to look for my watch and find out how many minutes i have left. *krrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrng* time was up. bwahaha...
i still had lots of time before my first class starts. i have no more load and the only place i know is the library. and of course friends of mine are staying there studying for accounting (i failed the very first quiz today). i had to go somewhere not to crowded and closed. i am suffocating there. but in my kingdom. the air is fresh and the ambiance is very friendly for the morning.
it was weird. i didn't sing a song in my kingdom. not a single song. it was a miracle. i just drank my morning coffee. i wanted to see 'dream' buit i saw him when i was on my way to class. just after i put my bag in san's car. we went straight to class because we don't want to be late. ah crap! i don't want to attend class but i have to! i need to bring myself in place. get my scores up high.
the day - tiring! the 2-hour break wasn't enough for watching "My Sassy Girl". We didn't even get to the good part. But we had to leave. it was our accounting test. and we didn't want to be late as always. so as always, i didn't get anything right. i didn't even know if i scored anything from the identification part. it was horrible. i can't even understand how the journalizing goes. pathetic! i shouldn't have cut classes. buit even if i did attend the class. i would be so drunk, i wouldnt understand anything too.
Whacked! i went to glorietta. i hitched in san's ride and i went all the way to glorietta to eat then go home. i just wanted to go somewhere. i wanted to see some friend of mine, but unfortunately, that some friend doesn't want to see me. it's hard. when all of a sudden, you lost contact of a very close friend. you would miss him/ her so much. just a single day without talkin' or chattin' with the person - would kill you. its like a whole year, whatsoever time, that you have been apart. what more if you're not just friends. it would be very hard to lovers to be apart even for a second. i wonder?
i was just thinking... what if something happens to me... whatb if i die tonight. i didn't have the chance to say i love you to the one i love (i haven't found you!), to the people i love, family and friends. who will cry? who would lock themselves up in their rooms and mourn. what would people do? will the "cry" indicate friendship? i wish that those people i consider as friends would cry just a little teardrop. i don't intend to be the cause of pain. but i just want to know... who are my friends? who are my true friends?
i once wrote:
untitled
friends are there when i have money
friends are there when i am happy
but now i'm broke, i can't see their faces
now i'm lonely, i ask, "Why are my friends hiding from me?"
is it just my wealth you're after?
are you just a friend for laughter?
can i count on you to be here beside me?
will you be a friend for eternity?
i was just a kid when i wrote this. but i feel that some friendsa re not really friends. i know who... i just want to see... but if i'm wrong, i'm so sorry. it's just how you show this it to me.
crazy days give me crazy ideas. crazy, ain't it? i just wonder. am i crazy?
"to be or not to be. that is the question."
bwahahabwahahaha
i still had lots of time before my first class starts. i have no more load and the only place i know is the library. and of course friends of mine are staying there studying for accounting (i failed the very first quiz today). i had to go somewhere not to crowded and closed. i am suffocating there. but in my kingdom. the air is fresh and the ambiance is very friendly for the morning.
it was weird. i didn't sing a song in my kingdom. not a single song. it was a miracle. i just drank my morning coffee. i wanted to see 'dream' buit i saw him when i was on my way to class. just after i put my bag in san's car. we went straight to class because we don't want to be late. ah crap! i don't want to attend class but i have to! i need to bring myself in place. get my scores up high.
the day - tiring! the 2-hour break wasn't enough for watching "My Sassy Girl". We didn't even get to the good part. But we had to leave. it was our accounting test. and we didn't want to be late as always. so as always, i didn't get anything right. i didn't even know if i scored anything from the identification part. it was horrible. i can't even understand how the journalizing goes. pathetic! i shouldn't have cut classes. buit even if i did attend the class. i would be so drunk, i wouldnt understand anything too.
Whacked! i went to glorietta. i hitched in san's ride and i went all the way to glorietta to eat then go home. i just wanted to go somewhere. i wanted to see some friend of mine, but unfortunately, that some friend doesn't want to see me. it's hard. when all of a sudden, you lost contact of a very close friend. you would miss him/ her so much. just a single day without talkin' or chattin' with the person - would kill you. its like a whole year, whatsoever time, that you have been apart. what more if you're not just friends. it would be very hard to lovers to be apart even for a second. i wonder?
i was just thinking... what if something happens to me... whatb if i die tonight. i didn't have the chance to say i love you to the one i love (i haven't found you!), to the people i love, family and friends. who will cry? who would lock themselves up in their rooms and mourn. what would people do? will the "cry" indicate friendship? i wish that those people i consider as friends would cry just a little teardrop. i don't intend to be the cause of pain. but i just want to know... who are my friends? who are my true friends?
i once wrote:
untitled
friends are there when i have money
friends are there when i am happy
but now i'm broke, i can't see their faces
now i'm lonely, i ask, "Why are my friends hiding from me?"
is it just my wealth you're after?
are you just a friend for laughter?
can i count on you to be here beside me?
will you be a friend for eternity?
i was just a kid when i wrote this. but i feel that some friendsa re not really friends. i know who... i just want to see... but if i'm wrong, i'm so sorry. it's just how you show this it to me.
crazy days give me crazy ideas. crazy, ain't it? i just wonder. am i crazy?
"to be or not to be. that is the question."
bwahahabwahahaha
Saturday, January 17, 2004
the long day is over
how can i say that the day is over? do i need to say something? i mean oh well. this day was very tiring. i wake up, took a bath, dressed up and went to school. i stayed in school from 10:20 - 7:00pm. 8 hours and 40 minutes, i was running here and there inside the school campus. butbut half the time, that i was there, i was hanging out in my kingdom.
i had a very good lunch. it was a good lunch. not only does my wallet still has something in it, but also does my stomach full and tight. bsta. i was solved by 57 pesos. 1 bartburger, 1 jumbo burger a juice and a song, it felt like heaven! heaven to me. i kept thinking if i get someone to be with during the times i want to eat in BM (Burger Machine - place to go when you are saving money or if you dont have money at all), even if its far away, i could really save up. hah!!! this is something to think about. or maybe!!!! i should just bring my own food everyday.!!!
we have our ROTC tomorrow. and it bugs me that i have to wake up early again tomorrow to go to school. it bums me big time that we would be under the sun for 6 hours... actually not our platoon (we are just the regular guys! people don't care about us.. not a bad thing! at all!). we stay at the classroom and burn our butts until the we check our attendance in the field again and leave. hahhahahahah! i think it is really a waste of time to go to school and do that program. i don't know why they still implement that law... as i said, it is a law! so what can we do about it? even if we have the right to question that law??? as many people did, to take the program away, we will still fail. as to the governemtn it is an obligation. hahaha! obligation my ass. whatever!
i was watching this film, "il mare"(means 'the sea'), when i remembered recent events in the recent life in the recent recent recent!!!! it is a long story? 'i will tell you a long story. can i trust yoU!!!???' *sniff* *sniff* *sniff*
happy birthday tito villy! i hope you have many more birthdays to come... it is the birthday of my cousin's father, tito villy. they're our neighbor so when i got home from school, they invited me over to eat dinner. i was alone eating but it was fine. siomai, shanghai rolls, hicken, pancit... i was solved again!. i catched up with them when they were playing MONOPOLY. i was chatting with ate chri about the LRT and MRT. hahaha sana pwede na tyo magsabay sa LRT. mas masaya... wish ko lang!
the day is almost over. i have to sleep early. for tomorrow is another long day. hahaha catch ya'll when i catch ya'll!
i had a very good lunch. it was a good lunch. not only does my wallet still has something in it, but also does my stomach full and tight. bsta. i was solved by 57 pesos. 1 bartburger, 1 jumbo burger a juice and a song, it felt like heaven! heaven to me. i kept thinking if i get someone to be with during the times i want to eat in BM (Burger Machine - place to go when you are saving money or if you dont have money at all), even if its far away, i could really save up. hah!!! this is something to think about. or maybe!!!! i should just bring my own food everyday.!!!
we have our ROTC tomorrow. and it bugs me that i have to wake up early again tomorrow to go to school. it bums me big time that we would be under the sun for 6 hours... actually not our platoon (we are just the regular guys! people don't care about us.. not a bad thing! at all!). we stay at the classroom and burn our butts until the we check our attendance in the field again and leave. hahhahahahah! i think it is really a waste of time to go to school and do that program. i don't know why they still implement that law... as i said, it is a law! so what can we do about it? even if we have the right to question that law??? as many people did, to take the program away, we will still fail. as to the governemtn it is an obligation. hahaha! obligation my ass. whatever!
i was watching this film, "il mare"(means 'the sea'), when i remembered recent events in the recent life in the recent recent recent!!!! it is a long story? 'i will tell you a long story. can i trust yoU!!!???' *sniff* *sniff* *sniff*
happy birthday tito villy! i hope you have many more birthdays to come... it is the birthday of my cousin's father, tito villy. they're our neighbor so when i got home from school, they invited me over to eat dinner. i was alone eating but it was fine. siomai, shanghai rolls, hicken, pancit... i was solved again!. i catched up with them when they were playing MONOPOLY. i was chatting with ate chri about the LRT and MRT. hahaha sana pwede na tyo magsabay sa LRT. mas masaya... wish ko lang!
the day is almost over. i have to sleep early. for tomorrow is another long day. hahaha catch ya'll when i catch ya'll!
Friday, January 16, 2004
starting with a new
everybody has to start somewhere...
i just got home from school 9:00 in the evening with all the thought in my head of surfing the net. i was hoping to catch someone in the messenger. to find five former classmates of mine from St. Theresa's College.
we started conversing about love and love and love... many thoughts, many experiences shared. then we ended up having the group of singles...
http://singlesinthecity.blogspot.com.. blog, friendster, e-group, mail, we have made one for our group. we are commemorating our singlehood. that even if we are single we enjoy life as it is and enjoy being single. its not an abnormality. it will come and time will tell.
it is true. we singles are sometimes your savior. without us, you won't have those people you can run to when you have problems with your partner, kung gusto niyo ng date and desperate to find one. here we are!
we are not jealous. actually its much better because we have to get ourselves into the thinking... what we really want and what we need. we coud prepare for the person who we could share things with. when it's time, it's time. no matter how bumpy the road will get, it will!
we have converse about it. i kept thinking. would this be singles for life? would there be anybody? so soulmates are not true? because if anyone, out there is for me, why hasn't he came to save me from this treacherous world.
moving on! the time has come to forget the past and think of the present. don't think about the future because it will only make your head hurt. pain, pain, pain, pain!
"life is a road, i want to keep going. love is a river, i want to keep rowing. life is a road, now and forever. wonderful journey. in the end, i wanna be standing at the beginning."
i just got home from school 9:00 in the evening with all the thought in my head of surfing the net. i was hoping to catch someone in the messenger. to find five former classmates of mine from St. Theresa's College.
we started conversing about love and love and love... many thoughts, many experiences shared. then we ended up having the group of singles...
http://singlesinthecity.blogspot.com.. blog, friendster, e-group, mail, we have made one for our group. we are commemorating our singlehood. that even if we are single we enjoy life as it is and enjoy being single. its not an abnormality. it will come and time will tell.
it is true. we singles are sometimes your savior. without us, you won't have those people you can run to when you have problems with your partner, kung gusto niyo ng date and desperate to find one. here we are!
we are not jealous. actually its much better because we have to get ourselves into the thinking... what we really want and what we need. we coud prepare for the person who we could share things with. when it's time, it's time. no matter how bumpy the road will get, it will!
we have converse about it. i kept thinking. would this be singles for life? would there be anybody? so soulmates are not true? because if anyone, out there is for me, why hasn't he came to save me from this treacherous world.
moving on! the time has come to forget the past and think of the present. don't think about the future because it will only make your head hurt. pain, pain, pain, pain!
"life is a road, i want to keep going. love is a river, i want to keep rowing. life is a road, now and forever. wonderful journey. in the end, i wanna be standing at the beginning."
Thursday, January 15, 2004
shout at the top my voice....
have you ever felt the urge to shout when you're so pressured of the happenings around you. its so hard not to see feel that burst in your heart. lidsuabdcldasjcnwli;euhfwnc lwuic;wajke clawhc;woai cwqb delau awdjncfeqwhgc'awoedichewjdb...
i really want to shout at the top of my voice. but i really can't. even if i wanted to. people will hear me and they would be asking me and i would be telling them my problem and it would result to crying and crying and crying. i really don't want that. my eyes hurt already. i've been crying my eyes out since monday and my eyes is not that swollen but it really hurts. it's like i've not slept for a whole week.
if you look at it closely. i don't want people to call me selfish but it would be very painful for both sides if it will continue. long-distance does not work that well. it is really hard. i know. i've been there and i don't think can do it again. pero if i don't know, i really can't say something. i couldn't end my statement because at times like this never does it happen that there is a repetition of situations. i couldn't get myself to type it and give out all the emotions inside of me. i just couldn't get it out of my system.
have you ever thought of this... my friend posted in our groups the question "is love for you?" have you given a thouht to this. when will it really come. when it will stay? who will it be? how will it happen? will it ever come? we don't know. well its for us to find out... i once said that if you want to know the taste of the food, you have to find it out yourself.
think about it. i am still thinking too.!!!!!
i really want to shout at the top of my voice. but i really can't. even if i wanted to. people will hear me and they would be asking me and i would be telling them my problem and it would result to crying and crying and crying. i really don't want that. my eyes hurt already. i've been crying my eyes out since monday and my eyes is not that swollen but it really hurts. it's like i've not slept for a whole week.
if you look at it closely. i don't want people to call me selfish but it would be very painful for both sides if it will continue. long-distance does not work that well. it is really hard. i know. i've been there and i don't think can do it again. pero if i don't know, i really can't say something. i couldn't end my statement because at times like this never does it happen that there is a repetition of situations. i couldn't get myself to type it and give out all the emotions inside of me. i just couldn't get it out of my system.
have you ever thought of this... my friend posted in our groups the question "is love for you?" have you given a thouht to this. when will it really come. when it will stay? who will it be? how will it happen? will it ever come? we don't know. well its for us to find out... i once said that if you want to know the taste of the food, you have to find it out yourself.
think about it. i am still thinking too.!!!!!
Wednesday, January 14, 2004
life must go on...
i have news. i think i would "never had a dream come true. till the day that i found you. even though, i pretend that i've moved on. you'll always be my baby" hehehe. it has been a day of misery yesterday for me. i'll continue it later.
peace out!
peace out!
My inner child is six years old!
Look what I can do! I can walk, I can run, I can
read! I like to do stuff, and there's a whole
big world out there to do it in. Just so long
as I can take my blankie and my Mommy and my
three best friends with me, of course.
How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla
i think it was the six year old me who dictated that it should end. i had my reasons and it doesn't really matter.
January 12, 2004
early in the morning, my friend picked me up and we talked from then. there is really nothing to share. the fact that we are still friends is enough. that is enough. i wanted to feel happy but still, i can't make out the smile i use to have in face all the time. well time will come. i'll be fine. it won't be easy to forget. why should i? even if there are bad time, i have learned from them and it made me different. I told a friend that i can do it again but i think i can never be a martyr like before. i have done it once and i don't think i should do it again. he yold me, to follow my heart. bullshit. i an never hear my heart beat again. its very hard to find someone that would make you smile and just view life with much happiness. what more could i ask for a friend.
almost everybody who have heard the news, consoled me in different, yet comforting way. Yot, nicky, trish, chloe, raise, chet, mike, and enzo hugged me. Reden, dove,san, nicole, jc, joel, ange, and zaza gave me advices. they were very helpful. but i'm very thankful for reden. he has gave me the strenght to do what i really have to do. the people who gave me the hug, did this without question. they approached me and gave it to me when i really needed it. i've realized i have friends who loves me and i love back. i love you guys! i really wanted to cry but no tear has fallen again since that very morning.. thankful as i am. but i wanted to shed tears. it would make the pain go away if th etears gushed from my eyes down my face and into my hanky. but no, i am still numb. numb numb numb
love is blind. as far as the eyes can see. deep and meaningless. words to me. easy lover, i need a friend. road to nowhere. twist and turns but will this ever end. love will always flourish. it doesn't go away. it is hidden. there is pain because there is love and if there is love automatially there is pain. a friendly reminder: to love is something extraordinary. to be inflicted with pain is something you sacrifice for something extraordinary.
January 13, 2004
another ordinary school day. but it is not quite ordinary. i ahve spent 1000 bucks for this day. but not for food. for something different and shocking - school books and supplies. i'm gonna get that money back. well everything was in place. we had our classes, i ate, i hanged out in agno, and i started to like economics. whoa! something different.? yes! i have liked this lass since today. but i don't know until when. maybe it's just the topic of discussion - Maroeconomics (geek!!!), maybe its because it wasn't too animating like our economic lass before. not that i'm complaining but to tell you guys the truth. even if i got 2.5 = 80-84, i still didn't understand anything from that class. we all had our laughs but that was all. i could remember those stories but never the lessons. it was sad because he was a very good teacher... maybe it was me... we don't know.
i was thinkin' what if joel is right. what if "pare" would happen.?? NAH!!! that won't! you know why. because it won't. enough said! i can tolerate whatever teasing you give me. i don't care.
i missed my old self. i've been very sentimental these past two days. and i don't really like acting this way. i want the wacky kat!!!! i want her back!!! soon!!! it will take someone... DREAM... it will take something... DREAM... it take everything... DREAM. it will take DREAM... for me to go back to normal. take care people!!!
Sunday, January 11, 2004
some things can really be depressing
Which Spongebob Squarepants Character Are You?
this made me happy. even if im still a little depressed... ill tell you everything. its just not yet sure.
whatever happens... i will do the best i an to still be the me you know.
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